An unwanted breakup can be one of the toughest things you’ll ever have to go through. The pain of seeing your ex boyfriend, the dull ache of hearing your songs on the radio… these things can sap your strength and send you into deep depression. But snap out of it! If you want to know how to get back an ex boyfriend, the first thing you’ll need to do is pick your chin up and stop feeling sorry for yourself. You’ll never get him back out of pity, and even if you could, would it last long? If you want him back, you have to put yourself in a positive frame of mind. Only then can you begin repairing your relationship.
One of your first steps is accepting the end of your relationship. What you had is now over. You cannot build on a shoddy foundation, which is why you need to tear it down and let old wounds heal before you can begin trying to build it back up again. Stop trying to convince yourself that you want to make up with your ex, because you don’t. What you want to do is construct a whole new relationship with him, from scratch. This allows you to use good, solid, trustworthy bricks, upon which the best relationships are built.
The next thing you’ll need to do? Nothing. Disappear for a while. Your ex can’t miss you if you’re always around. Don’t let him see you, hear from you, or ask your friends what you’re doing. Disappear off the face of his world, giving him time to wonder how you’re doing, what you’re up to, and most of all, what you’re thinking about him. If you don’t call, contact, email, text-message, or see your ex boyfriend… he’s actually going to miss you. Yes, even if he initiated the break up. Guys always want to know the door is still open, even if they’re the ones who closed it. Getting a ex boyfriend back requires initially vanishing from his radar.
Eventually, your boyfriend’s own ego will grab hold of him. He’ll wonder why you were so unaffected by the break up, and he might even start to question whether or not he made a mistake. Guys hate to think they made the wrong move. That’s why seeing you depressed or crying can often be a comfort to them: it’s not that they wish these things upon you, it’s just that it validates that they made the right decision.
After your initial disappearing act, you’ll eventually bump into (or hear from) each other again. From that moment on, every single time your ex sees or hears from you, you should be having the time of your life. You should be happy, laughing, and having a great time with friends. This will shatter his illusions of comfort, and it also slams the door completely closed. You’ve taken away his relationship safety net – you’ve moved on without him. Up until this point he was sure he could get you back whenever he wanted, but now… he’s not sure anymore. This will scare him a little. And seeing you happy will actually make you more attractive to him.